Depression

I think with any incurable illness your more likely to suffer with depression compared to a healthy person (might get slaughtered for that remark) I some times look at these healthy individuals and think what have you got to be depressed about? Is that selfish of me? But they get depressed over the silliest things (oh shit I've put 2lbs worth of weight on) yeah because that is such a major thing to be depressed over least you don't have to eat a chocolate bar before you do exercise in which then what is the point of exercising. I'm quite down myself at the moment which I'm not afraid to admit even crying in the bathroom because I couldn't get myself dressed after my shower the simplest of things. In most people's lives and i no someone out there is in a worse place and there probably saying (really is that all you couldn't do I can't even feed myself). I will eventually get my head straight as I normally do myself but for now this song pretty much sums up how I feel right now. Hopefully tomorrow I won't feel so selfish you probably think that it's a bit dramatic and some of the lyrics are missing but most of it is to how I'm feeling specially the ones about life and what's happening in my life at the moment but tomorrow's another day and hopefully I won't be so selfish.

And the world was a song

And the song was exciting

There was a time

Then it all went wrong

I dreamed a dream in time gone by

When hope was high

And life worth living

I dreamed that love would never die

I dreamed that God would be forgiving

Then I was young and unafraid

And dreams were made and used and wasted

There was no ransom to be paid

No song unsung, no wine untasted

But the tigers come at night

With their voices soft as thunder

As they tear your hope apart

As they turn your dream to shame

And still I dream he'll come to me

That we will live the years together

But there are dreams that cannot be

And there are storms we cannot weather

I had a dream my life would be

So different from this hell I'm living

So different now from what it seemed

Now life has killed the dream I dreamed